I was recently asked, “What do you do about a team member who is jealous?” I responded by saying they should ask that teammate what they are doing to achieve or deserve the things they were jealous of. That also applies to you in your life.
I just finished up an interview about salary negotiation where I said that the two most important things you can do is have the facts and know what you want. That also applies to you in your life.
You are 100% responsible for making your life what you want it to be. I am not saying there aren’t things that are outside of our control or that we should never take the needs of other people into consideration. I am saying if life isn’t going where you want it to, you have the control and the responsibility to change it.
Ask yourself these questions:
- If my life was perfect, what would it look like?
- What small steps can I take to move toward one of those things?
- If I am not moving toward anything from my perfect life, why not?
If your answers to the last question are about other people, you are not taking responsibility for your own happiness. There is nothing that says happiness will be handed to you on a silver platter. But you do have the right to pursue it. If you’re not, that’s on you.
Once you have the answers to those questions you will know what you want and that you are responsible for moving toward your goals. Now it’s time to gather the facts:
- Why am I passionate about this goal? The answer to this question is going to keep you moving when things get tough or you get down. If you don’t know why you want something you won’t have the fire to keep driving forward when you reach a road block. The why is tied to your emotions. And emotions are King of the Land inside your mind. Tie your emotions to your goal and the drive will be there.
- What does it take to reach one of my goals in my perfect life? If you want to meet your soul mate, you should be out meeting people. If you want to run a marathon, you better on a training plan. If you want a better job, engage in research for what’s out there and how to get it.
- How have other people reached my goal? There is no better way to make something happen than to follow a path that you know ends where you want to be. There is no reason to hack your way through the jungle if someone else already did it. Even if no one has reached the exact place you want to be, gather information that is similar and meld it to your unique goal.
I am living my perfect life because I am in hot pursuit of my passions every day. I know, for as long as I am on this planet I will be striving to make a positive difference in the lives of everyone I meet. That quest will never end. The goal will never be reached until I have helped every person on the planet; and yet I am fulfilled everyday by the pursuit.
Do you have a mission that makes your life perfect? Share it with us! If you don’t, I highly recommend finding one. It will make the ride worthwhile!